When I pray I always asked God not to let my grandmother die as then there would not be any one to look after me any more.
I loved her so much that I would do any thing to make her happy. She was always asking me to be a good girl and not to make a noise. It was as if she was begging me not to be a child, not to do any thing that would upset my grandfather, life was so unbearable.
I remember going to the Salvation Army Christmas Carol Service it was held at the Mule Yard in James town. We would dress up as angels and I was always so excited and happy. I always had a wonderful time and I didn’t want it to end nor did I want to go home.
When we arrived at home my grandmother told my grand father that the sea was very rough and the waves were very high at west rocks. My grandfather said that my grandmother had missed out on a good chance to have thrown me into the sea and drown me .I had become quite used to my grandfather verbally and physically abusing me.
I learned not to take any notice of him and his abusive words, but the look of horror, unhappiness and sadness on her face was some what unbearable for me as she had told me over and over again how unhappy she was when her daughter Lilly had died. The things he said would come back to haunt him over and over again even into his older age.
I still pray, but now I pray for my family to keep them safe, happy and healthy. I also pray thanking god for removing me from such a horrible situation.
Prayer.