While I was browsing through Facebook I came across some photos of my younger sisters children. My sisters children are indeed beautiful children. I thought what a contrast to me at that age. The youngest little girl was around age four years old. She was two and a half years older then I was when my mother had left me with her parents. My mother never came back.
My mother had written “My special girls it was lovely to have them stay with her for a weeks holiday.”
I am not at all a jealous person but I felt somewhat sad that my mother was gloating on Social Media about her granddaughter’s being special and spending holidays with them and her daughter. I am her first born child and I should also be seen as special.
Three years ago I rang my mother and asked her if I could visit her. She sounded very off and she said that she would need to think about it. My heart sank and I thought to myself my mother abandoned me at eighteen months old and I didn’t see her for twenty-three years yet she couldn’t find the time to see me or let me visit her.
She treats my sister the same rotter way that she treats me. I know that I won’t ever see my mother again as she simply doesn’t care about her two older children. She has never seen my children or my sister’s children. We don’t miss what we never had but every child no matter how old they are wants a relationship with their mother.