I think of people all the time .The ones who pass briefly through my life and the ones who have stayed for 37 years. .I think of Bel, she was a lovely kind soul, she was always buying presents for her family that she could ill afford. I met her whilst working in an awful nursing home in St Roland’s road in Portsmouth. She told me to apply for a job at The Home of Comfort. I was a relief support worker for a while, until one of the carers left and I was offered the position. I loved working there . The money was so much better , plus we had free meals. Bel was diagnosed with cancer and died before she turned 60. I will never forget Bel, such an incredible woman. I met Luiza when Robert and I moved into Anglesey road, in Orpington . She was from Brazil, I thought she was from St Helena. She had two small girls and so did I . After walking our girls to St Mary’s school. We would have coffee at her house. After school she would cook us all a meal. I was always grateful to her. She lived in a small terrace house her music was always on full blast. One of her neighbours had lost her only child in a fatal car accident , she liked to be with Luiza’s children . Edna died in her sleep, she never came to terms from losing her daughter. I moved to Portsmouth and lost touch. we spoke to each other by phone some twenty years later, It was so lovely to hear her voice. Her English had improved, I was sad to learn that she had been diagnosed with throat cancer. She died around 2 years later. I will always remember Luiza with the greatest of affection , she was kind, funny , witty and generous too. I worked with Debbie Sharp at Wimborne nursing home on Hayling island. She was a laugh. she wasn’t very tall, she drank far too many sugary drinks which contributed to her rather large midriff. the elderly people we looked after were always asking her when her baby was due. She told us she had a hernia. Debbie later worked with people with mental health. Her marriage to Joey had broken down , she moved back home to Liverpool. I rang her but she was busy. I lost touch with her and was sad to learn she was dying. I can’t believe she died just 2 weeks after her husband. I have little gifts that she gave me for xmas. it was an occasion
that she loved, buying present for everyone , even the ones she didn’t like. She was kind, sensitive, she sometimes told the odd white lie, however they were not harmful or spiteful. I remember meeting one of my in laws for the first time , my soul was warning me to be careful of this person. For 37 years they lied about me. They were jealous of me, she taught her children to disrespect me too. She gloated when my marriage broke down saying it wasn’t a proper marriage anyway. I wasn’t at all surprise by her nasty spiteful comments. I was sad that she had harboured such thoughts for so long. She rang me to say Robert was never coming home. She went on to say she had rang the care agencies to support me. I never heard from her again .but the impact she had on my life was far from pleasant. Even when her children were deep in grief for her passing ,It was quite disturbing that they were saying “don’t tell Dorothy anything”. They thought I was going to turn up at her funeral. My estranged husband Robert betrayed me, broke every vow he made to me. he lied , cheated and ridiculed me. he wouldn’t look at me or stand next to me . I hear from him every night, only because the love affair of his life didn’t work. He even ask me to come back to him . I loved my husband , but I will never disrespect myself. I met Lisa Brennan from the Isle Of Wight children’s services in 2017. She seem to be ok but I always had this gut feeing something wasn’t right. I couldn’t wait to get away from her. Ms Brennan had written in a feedback report claiming she saw me groped my grandson, she went on to say she moved my hand away. She has never touched my hand.. she retracted her statement. I will never forget what Lisa Brennan did to me . I have a feeling she is depraved, and twisted, nasty and spiteful. She has no morals or decorum, she is a liar. I don’t want to get to her cesspit level , but I am pretty damn angry. Seeing my first born for the very first time my emotions were everywhere. I didn’t want a baby at all. I concealed my pregnancy. I was hoping she would die. I was bringing her into the same cruel world that I existed in for 18 years. her father was much older than m, I caught him in bed raping his special needs sister. I made a quick exit and moved in with Johnny and Evelyn Corker , they claimed to be Christians, far from it , they were foster parents from hell. She mentally abused me while he physically and sexually abuse me. They were fine with my baby . my foster father Johnny Corker punched me in the face whilst I was holding the baby. I have a lovely relationship with my oldest daughter and I wouldn’t be with out her. My second baby was a joyous moment . I was surrounded by Robert’s family, we were over the moon. Everything was so different, I loved my husband and I was able to enjoy my pregnancy and we took her home. Last and not least meeting Anthony was somewhat wonderful. He is honest , kind and caring it truly is an honour to have him in my life. A flash of good and grim memories -untouched by time.by Dorothy Maude